If you find yourself in a conflict with someone else and you can’t escape, there are two options:
- Convince your opponent (Diplomacy).
- Force your opponent (War).
DIPLOMACY…
Convincing requires tact and patience. You must determine “what is right?” instead of “who is right?”
You should always give your opponent the benefit of the doubt. Be polite because antagonizing someone will only make them become defensive and dig into their position instead of considering yours.
Do not be the criminal defense attorney whose job is to defend a client even if guilty. If truth is your goal, you should cling stubbornly to no position on any issue. Always concede a good point. Listen.
Effective Diplomacy will hopefully produce a positive or at least neutral result for both sides. But if no agreement or compromise is possible, War might be the only option.
Related: America, Why So Stubborn?
WAR…
If you must fight, fight to win. Do whatever it takes.
“That’s unfair.” Of course it is. Fairness implies rules. In War, there are no rules. You win or you lose. You live or you die.
During the American Revolution, the British Army thought that the “fair” way to wage War was to line up and shoot at one another with muskets until one side was dead. The Americans instead used the military tactics of the Indigenous Peoples and fought “unfairly” by employing Guerrilla Warfare (ambushes, sabotage, raids, hit-and-run) breaking with British Military Traditions. Spoiler alert: The British lost.
The people in power (the status quo) want to dictate the rules of the game and ensure that they always favor themselves. They want everyone to line up with muskets and fire at each other until the side with more muskets wins. Guess who has more muskets?
Hypocrisy does not matter in War because the highest morality is victory. One side will outlaw protesting, but immediately protest when out of power; condemn hate speech, but say the most vulgar things about their enemies; lambast the media for being biased, but endorse all favorable coverage; point out every time their enemy lies, but lie a hundred times more. It is foolish to point out your enemy’s inconsistencies when they only care about beating you by any means necessary.
Perhaps you feel that moral consistency is more important than victory and that certain actions are off the table. But as you consider this, also consider something as “unquestionably wrong” as committing genocide, and then please enjoy another day of extreme peace, prosperity, and comfort inhabiting the lands of America’s Indigenous Peoples.
Moral consistency matters amongst friends and allies because developing trust is paramount to building relationships. But enemies will not respect any moral boundaries that you believe to exist.
THE DIFFERENCE…
I am not advocating for violence. I am advocating that we all recognize the vast difference between War and Diplomacy and know when to use which.
Diplomacy, if possible, is always the best solution. Even the greatest military strategist of all time said:
“The supreme Art of War is to subdue the enemy without fighting.” ― Sun Tzu, The Art of War
For if you choose War against a potential ally, you may create an enemy. And if you choose Diplomacy against a certain enemy, you may lose before the War even begins.
The genius of America is that our government allows War to be waged first at voting booths, in courts of law, and via public opinion. Though non-violent, these are battles none-the-less that require a deep understanding of warfare in order to win (I suggest reading Sun Tzu and Machiavelli).
46% of Americans did not vote in 2016 so stop trying to get your enemy to philosophically agree with you (when they have proven they will not change) and start inspiring your allies to vote.
Ignore any talk of “fairness” from your opponent. If a tactic is working to your advantage and your allies endorse it, keep using it. Your enemy will never endorse your tactics, fair or not.
But, above all, know who your enemy truly is and fight them (at the polls). Politely engage potential allies. Know the difference. Good luck.
This article was originally published on 14 June 2018.