In 2018, give everyone the benefit of the doubt. When someone challenges you in any way, whether in person or even on a Facebook post, assign them the best of possible intentions. Never villainize anyone. Imagine everyone as being the proverbial “Good Guy” in their own life’s story and therefore assume that their personal ethical code is meant to achieve the greatest good (for at least them, if not everyone else).
Think about a funeral. When reflecting on the recently departed, it is rare to hear slanderous and humiliating stories of misdeeds. More likely (except in rare cases of the truly miserable), the chatter and reflection on the deceased is almost fictionally flattering and fond.
This “photoshopping of character” is much more tenable postmortem. But it begs the question: why do we ever portray each other in a negative light? Is it to cast aspersions on someone who maintains an ethical position opposite our own? Is it out of jealousy? Is it because we see the possibly harmful ramifications of someone else’s actions and wish to manipulate their behavior via biting criticism?
Whatever the reason, framing another person in the worst possible light can only be detrimental to all parties. 2017 showed us how division and character assassination can be so poisonous and fatiguing to the National psyche. Maybe bridging the divide this year could be so much more attainable by appealing to the best in one another.
Let us refuse to hate those we disagree with and let us refuse to think about the world in terms of good and evil. We are all good. We are all worthy of love. We are all trying to live (and live well). We may have different ideas about what is best, but moving hearts and minds toward their greatest potential can never start with contempt.
In 2018: patience, positivity, optimism, and always the benefit of the doubt.
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This is interesting very unlikely that I’ll apply it to my own personal life BUT it would be good to see the politicians do it. I heard some political strategists on MSNBC say they predict we’ll see a lot more bipartisanship this year. Whatever they’ve been doing before didn’t work so maybe reaching across the aisle is just what the country needs. Or maybe we just need to beast the vote n November and get them all out of there?
Brianna – why would you not try it in your own personal life? Do you find it healthier to always assume the worst with other people and their actions? Have you ever experienced a situation where you thought the worst of someone, were wrong, and your incorrect assumption caused you to behave in a way that was harmful to that person, yourself, or the relationship? The article is clearly just encouraging optimism in relationships.
“It’s unlikely I’ll try it in my own relationships” because I read and analyze people very well. There are people of certain thought processes and beliefs that I do not wish to associate with and it’s because I’ve never been wrong when I take that stance. Maybe one day i will but do far i haven’t been and i trust myself more than optimism. I will never love my in-law who voted for Trump and I don’t want it. I reserve and act on that right.
I pray whatever you choose works for you, DW.
Do you consider that your opinion of that person might influence how you treat them and thus how they react? (A self fulfilling prophecy?) Did you see the recent Sarah Silverman article? That’s the spirit of this article.
So it’s okay and possible for me to have an opinion and they not know it. I stay clear from them. They can think and act however they want it’s not maybe problem. I stay away. I didn’t read the Silverman article, I’m not a fan. I took this article to say we can expect more bipartisanship in 2018, my personal relationships and decisions aren’t important here and they won’t change. Frankly, I don’t want to.
It’s worth a read:
http://www.ladbible.com/news/celebrity-news-sarah-silverman-reaches-out-to-twitter-user-who-abused-her-20180109
Nobody says you have to change. You can still detest the way someone thinks or behaves, but instead of demonizing them – try to love them (I’m not religious, but it was the best and most profound message of Jesus: love your enemies).